Pip Files

Thank you Facebook for creating the art of the self photo.  We contort our arm like,”No…I didn’t take this photo!  I have friend who is really into odd angle super close photos”  For years I have searched for the use of my crazy long arms.  I have felt like some sort of carney freak who has the worlds longest arms..”Come see the girl who can  grab all things on the top shelf.”  I figured I am 5’10” maybe it isn’t that bad..maybe I lookm in proportion.  I honestly believed that until I was being fitted for a photo shoot and the women pinning me asked the designer to come over.  They whispered and then finally busted out the tape measure.  There was a pause and I was told the following,” We will have to make the sleeves elbow length or add 3” to the cuff”..OK no worries..must be usual gettin’ it to look right talk..then a sigh..like I was about to be told I was dying or she wanted to breakup,” It is amazing..your arms are 3” too long for your body”.

So many of us hear the misguided ideas of the fashion industry…hair, skin and what your body should fit into (weighing 2 pounds is awesome and soooo attractive)..but where in the news do they talk about arm length???  Where are the magazine articles on woman who are too lanky to get work. I kept the job but had thoughts of maybe dinosaur arms are a better look.  Instead of sucking my belly in to see what I would look like..I would be destined to looking at my image with my arms pulled into my sleeves..(OK, that was a total fib-but the thought is pretty funny).  I could admit defeat and think I should find another withe same problem and run off to the land of Mr Tickle  but no…I searched and searched…

I found that long arms are awesome for yoga..it is 10x easier to wrap in postures.  I have to admit I also have the worlds longest phalanges…(those who know me “in person” feel free to comment -except my brother). So I have super long arms and ET fingers - just incase I can’t get the wrap.

And then I found Facebook…The second gift bestowed to the lanky.  I have the ability to take photos from a longer distance.  So all those with the NORMAL arms…we know you took the photo of yourself..we know because it is so close we can see if you need to work on your brows..(manscaping need not apply).

xoxo

Pip

Write..advice from a friend..just type and a blog will form! Blogs are odd.

It blinks with an on going beat
Mocking and laughing no tapping defeat

It is the creator of a timestamp on life
It records tales of goodness or strife

It still blinks no matter the time
Still I sit waiting without creating a line

I freaking hate the cursor

I have noticed the following when riding in the early morning:

1) at 4:30a.m. putting a helmet on is tricky

2) with my light on my bars I can make cool shadow puppets

3) the shadow puppets can be made to eat cars and rednecks with one bite ( think kids in the hall ..”I’m squishing your head”)

4) I can sing really loud while riding and no one can see me ( even if they can..I don’t care it is 4:30, they are either just getting in from a bar or they just got up)…I believe singing on my bike to be like einging in the shower..to you ..it sounds good.

5) In NC it can be 80 degrees in the morning

6) my fear of birds has ended..New fear…in NC bats can fly into your face while riding down a hill.

7) The day of the living Dead…

So in the next few days I plan to flesh out these thoughts…hope ya’ll are well and DONATE for 24 hours of booty…(www.24hoursofbooty.com….Last name Gregson)

xoxo

Pip

This commercial makes me laugh..actually guffaw every time I watch it. The voice of the stain is so damn funny..just had to share

Today started like most Thursdays..I woke up at 5am and headed to the gym hit the treadmill and watched 2004 Paris-Roubaix as I my motivation to work hard. After watching Magnus Bäckstedt take his win – I was stoked to get a ride in. It was cold this morning, 25 deg (in Charlotte that is like living in the North Pole cold) but I was more motivated to train and get to where I waned to be. I hoped of the treadmill and checked my HRM; I barely did a dent in what I wanted to do..No worries I will hit the road after I drop Monks off at school. Before climbing in my Jetta..I checked out my bike (Look 595 Elle) she has full Record Gruppo ,ceramic bb, ceramic rear pulleys, Strong Light CT2 ceramic coated chainrings, full ti Campy cassette and my Topolino wheelset..Yeah, I geeked out and was busted by an older guy walking up to his car. He asked “do you know the GUY who owns it?” ..”Sure do, tall and always wears pigtails” I hopped in my car fired up the diesel engine and hit the road. [A side note: I bought my car bc better gas mileage (42 miles per gallon), one day I want to convert it and I love pulling up in the carpool line and sounding louder than all the SUVs.]

I decided to grab a treat on the way home: 5 shot cappuccino for Ethan and a Chi Tea for me. After sitting in traffic and singing to the carload of business folks stuck next to me- I see Starbucks (no need to lecture me about corporate coffee..Their coffee is burnt blahblahblah-). Hmmmm…Maybe that was the problem. Maybe, 15 minutes later I would not have my “ugly cry face” on and had to have help from strangers-if I made the coffee at home.

As I drove up to the parking lot my life forever changed.

There are 3 noises that send chills down my spine 1) Monks being hurt or injured 2) getting in a car wreck 3) my bike hitting garage height bar

I just wanted to pop in Starbucks. I didn’t want to hear the sound of my bike and rack peeling off my car. I pulled into a parking spot and just sat there. I was too scared to get out and look at the bike. Tears began to well up in my eyes and that was the moment I knew I was in love with all things bike related. If you are reading this, I am pretty sure you are the same. Some people have photos of their kids (wish I could but it is preferred that I don’t. Trust me Monks is a total rockstar) or pets on myspace, blogs, facebook..But we have detailed descriptions of our loves our source of joy OUR BIKES. I climbed out of my car and my little Elle looked like an animal carcass on the side of the road. My saddle, that took ages to break in, was bent in half. The rack I received as a Xmas gift had been ripped off my car and tearing my trays in half. All I could do is put my head against my car and wish I would wake up from a crap dream. Meanwhile all the folks inside Starbucks are squished up against the window like kids looking in a toy store. I tried to take Elle’s sad little body off the car but it was cold, I was upset and the rack was too bent. Finally, a brave sole ventured out and helped me. I thanked him and he said it’s going to be OK it’s just a bike.

At that moment the kindness of strangers turned into are you kidding me..Just a bike..Just a freakin’ bike. I wanted to say to him when your dog died did your mum pat you on the head and say it was just a dog we’ll get you a new one. That might sound over the top-but I honestly appreciated all that went into my bike the time to find the perfect parts. We create a community and respect around our bikes. We blow off steam, commute and push ourselves on our bikes.
When I arrived home Monks and Ethan were hanging out and they both knew something was wrong. I blurted out- my bike is gone. I thought there would be the silence of “you jackass” looking back at me. Instead Ethan gave me a hug and informed me many have lost their bikes to the evil garage height bar.

*** We went back and measured the bar height the number posted was off by 5”***